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I have a bad feeling about this… part 1

July 1, 2010

Today is July 1st, 2010, one day after the premier of Twilight:  Eclipse, another entry into the epic love saga that is the Twilight series.  You know what else today is?  The day the trailer for the American remake of Let The Right One In, Let Me In, was released.  The sad truth is, at the time of this writing, that trailer has had 7067 hits and most comments are from people flaming it while Eclipse has had a record-breaking opening bringing in 68.5 million from a Wednesday release.

Have we become a society that no longer cares what constitutes as a good film and only feels the need to cater to the wants of tween girls who have unexplained tingling in their pants and will rush out to buy every shirt featuring Edward’s or Jacob’s face/abs (perhaps 3 of the same shirt for the latter) at the nearest Hot Topic?  The sad truth is that it is all about the Hot Topic revenue.  This is why Tim Burton still gets to make films.  While near perfect foreign films like Let The Right One In sit in the obscure sections at your local video retailer selling a few copies, Twilight still remains a hot seller, presumably because female masturbation with the boxes and discs wears them down to an unusable state, making them buy more copies.

If you haven’t noticed by now, the latter half of my first sentence was sarcasm.  I find the notion of Twilight as a film series obscene.  A trashy book series, sure, there’s a lot of those, but a film series just to exploit the sheeple?  Shame, Summit, shame.

Let me give you some background into my experience with Twilight.  I first heard about the series through my then girlfriend.  She was not an obsessed fan, swooning over anything that resembled a sparkly pale man… wait, I’m a sparkly pale man.  Shit, well, she wasn’t one of those fans who feel the need to shout “LEAVE EDWARD ALONE!!! LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!” and cry if someone calls it dribble.  The only time I heard about it was when her friend, her then boyfriend who happens to be my good friend, herself, and myself were sitting down in my friend’s living room.  My friend and I were playing some game, probably guitar hero 3 which was still the thing to do at the time, and the two females were talking about this awesome book series called Twilight.  They talked about it in great length about every detail in order since I had informed them, well, mostly my friend’s girlfriend, that I hadn’t ever even heard of it.  This seems to be an atrocity to them.  I can’t really complain, though, since I have the same reaction to people who haven’t read Harry Potter.

This was the first time I had ever heard of what would become a phenomenon of stupid the world should be lucky to never see again.  Before you get all pissy at that statement, let me retort that anything that can degrade a student at a State college and a student at UC Berkeley into screaming like  grade school girls at a Jonas Brothers concert is something that obviously has negative effects on the brain.

I eventually sat down to take everything that they were saying in.  Never before had I heard of something like this.  I had heard the entire story in the course of one night that felt like it would go on forever.  They seemed to be in a trance, reciting some kind of hymn that was given to them by a Deity that only they could sing if they encountered someone who asked.  I will admit, I did not regret asking what it was about.

After hearing their very detailed recitation as if they needed to do it in order to save the earth from destruction, my friend and I went somewhere, can’t remember where, and he turned to me and said, “Imagine living with that.”

“Imagine living with that.”

“Imagine living with that.”

The words echoed through my brain for weeks after.  I loved my girlfriend more than anything else and I would have loved to live with her, but would it be like that?  I never found out, but I imagine it wouldn’t have been.  Though it seems even a very intelligent person as herself could succumb to the lure of Twilight, it was only in the company of that friend, it seemed.

Now there seems to be a new breed of Twilight fan:  The illiterate youth of today, the blind masses who flock to anything that their herders point them to.

continued tomorrow…

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5 Comments leave one →
  1. jdelgadillo23 permalink*
    July 1, 2010 5:54 pm

    Haha! Daaamn dude, It’s like you hit on almost every topic your posts might be about: the ex, our hatred for that vampire saga, Harry Potter, movies, and rants. The only thing not mentioned was anime. We should explain our intents about the blog being against twilight.

  2. Demon permalink
    July 1, 2010 11:48 pm

    Haha niiiice.
    I hate Twilight too! *high fives*
    I wanna like set the books on fire and throw them at the fans that were waiting in line…
    okay… maybe your approach of a blog is better…and legal!

    -d

    • jdelgadillo23 permalink*
      July 2, 2010 11:25 am

      Pup I thought you were all about Twilight!

      • Demon permalink
        July 2, 2010 9:05 pm

        Eww. Of course not D;

        -d

  3. STEEN! permalink
    July 2, 2010 12:29 am

    Brilliant sire, simply Brilliant. I even cried a little while you bashed the FUCK out of that atrocity of a book series.

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