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I have a bad feeling about this… part 5

December 6, 2010

Today I decided to log into World of Warcraft and explore the new regions before the Azeroth flight kicks in. Exploring like the good ol’ days. Anyway, I was going wandering around the ruins of Gilneas, the Worgen home that was attacked by the Horde, and it got me thinking about this blog. Lately I’ve been really busy with stuff and haven’t really thought about this at all. Well, going through Gilneas and looking at all of the broken down buildings and gloomy atmosphere got me thinking about horror movies; werewolf movies to be more specific.

That broken down town would be perfect for a werewolf movie which is perfect considering the new Worgen (werewolves) were originally from there before the attack.

That brings me here, to Eclipse. This was directed by a known Twilight hater, David Slade. He directed 30 Days of Night, a perfectly fine vampire film, previously and then bashed on Twilight, yada yada…

Anyway, he came aboard and promised to bring a darker, more plausible tone to the franchise. This was supposed to draw in the Twilight haters or something. I don’t know… I heard that and giggled. This turned out to be the right reaction because the whole movie is laughable.

Don’t get me wrong! This is the best of the series, but not for the reasons the actual Twilight fans wanted. This entire movie is a parody of itself. Slade seemed to have instructed the actors to be as unbelievable as possible. It constantly pokes fun at the established Twilight relationships and mythos. This is the brilliance of this film, but also it’s downfall.

From the perspective of a film critic, it’s bad. Bad pacing, bad acting, bad music. Yikes. What a mess.

From the perspective of a Twilight fan (this might be inaccurate because I am not one of them), it’s alright. The pacing is still better than the first Twilight, the acting is on par with the acting from the previous, the music is still a mix of supposed to be dramatic and stuff you’d hear playing at a Hot Topic nowadays. If I were a fan, I wouldn’t be disappointed, but I wouldn’t be particularly happy.

From the perspective of a non Twilight fan, this is the best by far. It still has bad pacing and bad music, but the bad acting plays into the gentle jabs that keep the attention of the non Twilight audience.

What really surprised me was the acting. Yes, it’s bad pretty much all around, but Taylor Lautner, aka Wolf Boy, did the best job this time around! He still fulfills his duties by not having a shirt on pretty much the entire film, but he also does the job everyone else seemed to forget they were there for: To ACT.

I was almost ready to break down and call him a full fledged actor instead of just a dude that got the job because he seems to be able to make bras unhook with just a glance, but then the last scene happened… *SPOILER ALERT* After he gets seriously injured by the new vampire army or whatever that shit was, Carlisle Cullen does his doctor duties and patches him up, but once Bella gets in the room, it seems the good doctor did an actingectomy, because that was a horrible “in physical and emotional pain” face.

So yeah, bottom line, better, but not because of anything other than the comical take on the already comically melodramatic series. I’ll give it a 5. No, 4.5. Ah, I don’t know. I’m very mixed. I’ll say, as a film, 3, but as a Twilight film, 5.

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